“Ah this isn’t gonna be some long bore-fest review of your 2018 is it Alex?”
Ha, come off it, I’m not like that.
It is the new year though so you can’t help but peer back over the edge of 2018 to see what you’ve left behind. Indeed, I’m sure you’ve read at least one too many of those tweets or posts from people telling us what they’ve learnt over the past year, how they’ve grown from their mistakes and are certain that this year will ‘be the one’. “I’ve sure learnt who my real friends are this last year”, that’s always a classic.
The question I’m asking in this blog is this: what would one do differently heading into 2018 again with the gift of hindsight? I try not regret too much. Let’s not get too deep here, but if you didn’t have regrets then you wouldn’t have made any mistakes, and if you don’t make any mistakes then how are you supposed to learn? This whole 2018+1 concept is a fairly apt exercise for me actually because the first thing I did in 2018 was go full time again in my job at SD, a decision that put me back into working 50 hour weeks on top of running my business alongside it. Ha, what an idiot.
Idiot is an easy conclusion to make and perhaps it’s my arrogant insistence on always being right that instead leads me to conclude that I am in fact, a “visionary”. Okay, that’s a joke, but I don’t look back at that decision full of regret, far from it. At the time I was not hugely enjoying my business; I lacked motivation, it was a bit slow and I’d had a tough time of it over the summer. By going back full time I was giving my old, dependable (ish) job another chance to win me over. I’d been part time on both for a while and it wasn’t really working, it was neither one or the other, each were holding the other back.
In short, if I’d not gone full time again and suffered those few months then I could have easily floated around in that part time set up for a lot longer – maybe even up to now. The punt I took didn’t work, I couldn’t crack it; but it forced my hand, and I feel like I’m all the better for it now.
Imagine if you had woken up on January 1st and it was 2018 again though, what a strange thought…would you start changing stuff? Recalling where you went wrong first time round to fix everything for the better? As a kid I used to play this car racing game on the PC called Screamer 2, super advanced graphics, so much so it required 16MB RAM – ikr. Anyway, on a single player time trial you’d get into the second lap and be able to see the ghost of the your first lap car, allowing you to see how much you’d improved on your first effort. I suppose life can be like that. Not so much that every Xm*s the Ghost Of Ch*****as Past visits me to show me how I’m still a miserable git who still makes ginger people jokes and I need to be nicer to the world. But rather that you can end up looking back on life negatively, how you’d have been better off doing stuff this way or that, could’a would’a should’a sort of stuff.
Nah, we ‘ent got time for that fam. Move on. As they said in IT Crowd once, ‘Sorry for your loss. Move on’. Man, this blog’s gone downhill faster than one of those Gloucester cheese-rolling chasers. What I’m saying is this, and this much is true. You can waste forever regretting the past, but why not put it to bed and fight for your right to party instead.
It’s late, and all this talk of bed has got me tired. So I’ll go to sleep now, but I’ll leave you with one last thing. I’m pleased to inform you that all of this blog was in fact a dream; you’ve not got to go back to the start of 2018 and do it all again, you don’t need to go back to Old Kent Road, and you did pass go and collect £200. But it’s what you do with that £200 that really matters. Go forth, be strong. Peace and love this 19. Thanks. Th19anks.